so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
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