We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
