I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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