you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize