you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize