Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
You don't have asthma, your pregnant
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
