Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Randomize
