This girl is more easily done than said...
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
