I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
