this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
operation have a gay friend backfired
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Randomize
