So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
