You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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