susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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