Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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