Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
