So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
