Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
