I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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