i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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