you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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