Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
