so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
