Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
