So gin and wine won't be happening again
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
