It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Randomize
