I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
