sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
do nipples grow back?
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