dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Come see our sink grown plant.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
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