he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize
