Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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