is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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