The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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