im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
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