he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
