Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
