ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Randomize
