Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
