so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
