how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
