So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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