I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Randomize
