proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
