just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
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