so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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