Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Randomize
