Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize