she looked like the bat from fern gully.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
