I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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