Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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