Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore

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(408): View more from California

I think I just got seasick

(409): View more from Texas

you're not on a boat

(408): View more from California

he has a waterbed.

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(631): View more from New York

U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?

(248): View more from Michigan

ya, gonna go have sex there?

(631): View more from New York

No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home

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(817): View more from Texas

Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.

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(205): View more from Alabama

I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.

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(239): View more from Florida

im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.

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(760): View more from California

I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk

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(651): View more from Minnesota

of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck

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