dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
50% drunk capacity currently
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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